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The fourth date in two weeks. Another nice evening, but neither was there a particularly sparkling atmosphere, nor did I have a crush.

Every time you start all over again. I didn’t feel like messing around with this non-binding date. “Hey, thanks for the nice evening, let’s call soon!” Then nobody calls anymore.

Dozens of dates splashed around. I was slowly missing the one thing we men supposedly always want anyway. Sex.

For the past few months, I’d been training hard at the gym and taking a couple of decent six-pack selfies.

The second profile only shows my upper body, without a face. I had to laugh a little at myself. But I just wanted to see what happened. Because it obviously didn’t work any other way.

Sex is serious business. Because of all the taboos and uncertainties, the first intimate moments are a big step (unless you’ve had three bottles of wine together). Our author is in his mid-30s, journalist and comedian and has learned over time to laugh in bed – and thus create closeness.

Maybe that’s me. Maybe I’m too nice. This transition from a nice date to an erotically charged flirtation is my big weakness.

How do these men do it, who always have one-night stands with their tinder dates? Everyone has someone like that in their circle of friends. Should I ask about sex more aggressively on a date?

However, I’ve never heard from a woman that she likes this. “Then he said that I was completely cute. I drove to him immediately. His dick pics were hot!” Never heard. Or are they just not admitting it? And the men just do it stoically, get rejected 30 times and it works once. I don’t know if that’s something for me.

In his first column, he describes how laughter brings us closer during sex. You can read the whole text here.

After a few days, the first women liked my second profile. And at some point the first message: Judith found my photo attractive and also my text quite charming. But why am I only after sex? When you love someone, fuck is really awesome.

Fucking is hotter with love? That’s what I got out of it. Quite funny, but still the girl was too vulgar for me. I kindly wish her every success in her further search. But Judith didn’t give up, I’m unexpectedly nice now and why I’m not interested in something more binding.

Why did Judith write messages on a bare chest when she wanted a relationship? Some chats not worth mentioning followed that led to nothing.

Then Sarah answered and I realized that I hadn’t thought the whole thing through properly. “I like what I see, can I see your face before we meet?”

Sarah was beautiful. The tricky part: I knew Sarah! I had previously written to her from my normal profile. We were just dancing around a date.

I’m mostly honest, it makes my life easier. So I sent her a link to my other profile. She found this coincidence somehow funny, but canceled with thanks. First I wanted to protest that we actually liked each other on two profiles. Then I understood that my two-profile action is a bit strange.

To click: There is turn on – and then there are Tinder sayings (more of them can be found at Tinderwahnsinn)

More and more women wrote in a friendly manner and asked for a face picture. And when I sent it to them there was no more answer. On the one hand that hurt me, on the other hand it amused me that I was in such a situation at all.

I was about to bury the profile when the “Ficken-ist-mit-Liebe-hornier” lady answered again. She is in a club in the evening.

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